You First

Genesis 2:24–25 (NASB 95)

24 For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh. 25 And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.

Examine / Explain

When a man finds a suitable partner that God fashioned, he wants her to become one flesh with him. Because of this desire, a man is to no longer be treated as a child but to come out from under his parents and be one flesh with his help mate. They are no longer double a person but one person set to be a father and mother.

How do I apply this to my life?

I found it interesting that the first time the word father is used in the bible is about children leaving the home. A child is to leave their parents and cleave to their spouse. Instruction was given to Adam and Eve, but there was no context of mother or father in them. Not stated here anyway. They were a part of creation, made and formed from dust and man. What did they know about children or being parents? So, let’s say God helped them understand what it meant to be a father and mother. Something I am inferring from these verses is that there would be knowledge given to a child so that they would find a spouse and move out. They would have learned what it meant to be a father. I assume they would have learned how to farm and care for a garden. There would have been a legacy of knowledge passed down for generations. I’ve learned many things from my father. However, there are areas that were a struggle coming from him. Because he was a bad father, no! I question the legacy that was handed to him. And I believe that the enemy has made a full-on assault toward the men of God. They have become weak. Men have become passive and apathetic. So, these are the traits passed on down the generations. When we find Christ, we have to retrain our bodies, minds, and wills to be strong in the Lord. We have to figure out how to overcome the hurts and pains we suffered as children. We all have trauma as children. This world is fallen, and life is not lived as intended, so we can’t grow up as intended. We pick up coping mechanisms; the question is, are they the correct ones? We all have daddy issues. Our fathers are not God. The image given on the daily does not align with the true nature of God the Father, so in our development, we take what we learned about our Father and superimpose it on God. Hence, we all have daddy issues. What am I going to do about it? Do I go through life blaming God or my father for not receiving something, or do I work on transforming my mind and being a son and father the way God intends us to be? Will I get it right? Not all the time, but I believe that healthy emotional conversations and leading in a way that leans toward curiosity about being a son or father help. I’ve done things that have impacted my children in a negative way for their development. But walking them through this journey of life and pointing them to Christ is the best shot at passing on a legacy I could be proud of. Is there a quantifiable measure of success in passing on a legacy, maybe? Am I guaranteed that I will get to see it, not in this lifetime?

What is my response?

Father, renew my mind. Change my perspectives and guide me into fatherhood and sonship. I know I missed opportunities with our children. But you are the redeemer. Like a good father, you take the things we have broken and make beautiful things out of them. You allow us to come to You with our hurts. There are no limits on You. Change the imposition I have toward You. You never tire of us coming to You with hurts and complaints, but You also want to hear our praise and excitement. You want to be our Father in every aspect. Where we hesitate to bring life to You is the exact thing you want to hear. You want a relationship. You want us to come to You. Help me do that. Teach me what it means to be Your son. Teach what it means to have the ring put on my finger and the robe on my back and enjoy the feast. Help me to live! Amen.